Our Life & Times

It has been awhile since I last blogged. I was having technical difficulties with the website for a while and then I have somehow managed to lose my camera, so new pictures won't be getting posted until I buy a new one. Bummer. My mom moved out here to Colorado last summer. She finally found a nursing job in January and has been doing well with that. I transferred to another doctor's office closer to home in February and it has proved to be a God send with these gas prices and all. I am able 5 minutes from home and it has been nice this summer since Konnor is on summer vacation to be able to have lunch with him and drop him off at the pool. Speaking of Konnor, he is growing up so fast. He turned 12 in June and is going into the 7th grade. He will be playing football this fall for his Middle school, which is pretty exciting for him since he won't be playing little league football anymore. In January this year we got a much needed break and went to Disneyworld in Orlando, FL. We had alot of fun there. And then in June, we went on another much needed trip to Lancaster, PA where got to visit my sister and her family, my dad, my grandma and my aunt. We spent a day going to New York City with my grandma, which was very cool to finally get to see the Statue of Liberty. We also went to Hershey Park with my sister and my nephew, Gunner, and had a blast! Konnor will start school again August 14th. Until then he has been going to church camps, football camp, and this week he will be a helper with Vacation Bible School at our church. Oh yeah, Brian and I celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary on June 15th. Brian has a new hobby of building a model train set with all the towns and trimmings in our spare bedroom. Brian has also joined the church choir this year and has sung many solos already including Lee Greenwood's "God Bless the USA" during our patriotic Sunday for the 4th of July. One day maybe I will be able to record him singing and put it on the blog. I don't think I have forgotten anything. I sure have missed blogging though. I hope to get a new camera real soon so I can add new pics. That's half the fun of blogging! Oh yeah, I did forget to mention that we were 10 miles from the devastating tornado that hit Windsor, CO in May. The tornado did touch down in Milliken (where we live) about 2 miles east of Konnor's school while the kids were in the cafeteria eating lunch. We lost power for 2 days and had quite a bit of hail damage on our roof and camper. We have to have our roof replaced and the camper is still in the shop for repairs. We have not been able to use it yet this summer, which is sad. But we thank God that we have each other and our home. We have been to Windsor and have seen the destruction and devastation that tornado caused and we wouldn't wish that on anyone.

I have not blogged in awhile. Konnor started middle school on Aug 16th. He seems to be doing pretty well so far. He had an incident at school yesterday, but we were so proud of him. Some other boy was calling a girl bad names in one of Konnor's classes and Konnor told him to knock it off. Then the kid kept doing it so Konnor kicked the kid's shoe and told him again to knock it off. Then that kid took a pencil and stabbed Konnor in the back. It was not too bad, but Konnor did go to the nurse and the other kid got suspended from school. I was just so proud of him though for sticking up for his friend.

Our lives are filled with football right now. Konnor is playing 1st string quarterback this year, very exciting!!!! He is having a blast! Hopefully, I will have some new pictures to share soon!

Dear Jesus, Please keep our children safe in school. Give the teachers and administrators the knowledge and patience and understanding they need to do their jobs. Help the children know right from wrong and to know when something is absolutely not ok. I pray that those children and teachers who do not know you, Lord, will come to know you and love you. Please guide the parents to make the best decisions they can involving the education and care of their children. Please, Lord, give the parents, teachers, and children the strength and courage we need to make this a successful school year and to do your will always. Amen.

The quote of the month is by Jay Leno:"With hurricanes, tornados, fires out of control, mud slides, flooding, severe thunderstorms tearing up the country from one end to another, and with the threat of bird flu and terrorist attacks, are we sure this is a good time to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?"

I don't even know where to begin today. It has been such a long week. My uptake scan results are in and it is what I thought, there is definitely a nodule on my thyroid. However, I had to have more blood tests because my blood tests before and the scan didn't match up, one says I am hypothyroidism and one says I am hyperthyroidism. I will see the endocrinologist August 16th. Then I guess they will also decide how to proceed with the nodule being there and whether or not is is cancerous.

Then, when all was going better on Friday, we received a package in the mail from one of Konnor's birth grandmothers containing letters to Brian and I and one to Konnor basically blasting Brian and I for not making Konnor call her and see her in a year and a half. She lives only 20 miles away, has our phone number and address and never called us. Why should I call her to see if she wanted to see Konnor? Konnor didn't want to see her and I didn't make him.

Anyway, she also told Konnor in his letter of how his "mother" is clean and sober now and "grieves for him as if he were dead." Why would you write something like that in an 11 year old child's letter? I was and still am so angry I could explode! I called her immediately to hash this out and of course I got her answering machine. I left a not so very nice message and am wondering if she will ever call back. She also tried to bribe Konnor with a season pass to Six flags, gift cards, and a promise to give him a BB gun his "mother" bought him and his baby clothes and pictures if he would call them. Konnor does not want to call them and I don't feel I should make him.

When his birth parents lost their parental rights in court so did the rest of their family. However, we thought it would be beneficial for Konnor to keep in contact with his grandmothers and sister, so although we didn't have to, we allowed them visitation. It was never good enough though. It was never long enough. According to them. His grandmother (who was the one who put him in foster care in the first place) expected to have him on birthdays and holidays and full weekends. Why? It was necessary for our family's bonding process and Konnor's healing process to start having birthdays and holidays with us as a family.

Now, almost 5 years later, Konnor is FINALLY feeling as if he belongs. He struggled for years feeling like he was an outsider, and just when he starts to move on with his life his grandmother reappears out of nowhere and reminds him that he is adopted and although we are legally his parents, his blood family still loves and misses him so much. I understand she is feeling full of guilt and maybe she regrets giving Konnor up. But if she loves him so much why does she continue to disrespect his decision not to see them? And as far as having all this blood family that loves him and misses him, they ALL had an opportunity to step up and adopt Konnor before we did and NONE of them tried.

I just don't understand why now. And are we such terrible people that we deserve to be treated as though we have comitted some sort of crime? We took Konnor into our home when none of his birth family wanted him. We fed him, clothed him, played with him, taught him how to tie his shoes, taught him his address and phone number and how to tell time, helped him in school, attended all of his school and sports activities, took him to church, baptized him, planned his birthday parties and Christmases, took him to the doctor when he was sick, got his braces put on, played "toothfairy" and "Easter bunny" and "Santa Claus", read to him, tucked him in at night, and we taught him to be honest and respectful. I might not have given birth to Konnor but we are in every aspect his mom and dad. We are here through the good and bad. We have to be the ones to discipline Konnor when he messes up. We have to be the ones to go to his parent/teacher conferences and/or meetings with the principal. We take care of him when he is sick or hurt or sad or angry or just plain grumpy.

Anyway, as you can see I am pretty shaken up over these letters. Brian was mad, but like a man, he just acts like it is no big deal, and Konnor read both letters and all he wanted was the Six Flags season pass. I told him he should call his grandmother and he won't. Her phone number remains posted on the side of our fridge where it has sat for 4 1/2 years. There is nothing stopping Konnor from calling, except that he doesn't want to. What would you do if you were in our shoes? Of course, there are many other pieces of the puzzle I didn't mention, like when Konnor would go over there to visit for the day (when he was like only 8) she would drop him off at the pool all day with only his 11 year old sister to supervise, and he couldn't swim yet. Or how about the fact that there is a court order in place stating that there is to be NO contact AT ALL by his birth parents, but when Konnor would go over there his grandmother would save answering machine messages of Konnor's mother for him to hear and would give him presents telling him they were from his mother... There is just so much history. We were hoping it was all water under the bridge, but now we are having a flood.

We had a Busy week. I had my uptake scan for my thyroid Thurs and Fri. It will take a few days before I can get any results. Brian took Konnor to the Mile High Nationals drag races yesterday and Konnor got his picture taken with Ashley Force (John Force's daughter, if any of you are race fans). I took Mom out to dinner to the Red Lobster last night since the guys were at the races and then we went to Lowe's to get some things for Mom's house and then we went back to her house where we just hung out and talked a while. Mom had a job interview with Banner Health yesterday and it seemed very promising, although it was mainly for temporary nursing assignments, but they did tell her that is the best way to get your foot in the door at the hospitals around here. Keep your fingers crossed! Today I am catching up on cleaning, laundry and bill paying, and then I will go grocery shopping before we go to the Colorado Ice game tonight. (The CO Ice are a local minor league indoor football team.) I hope after church tomorrow we can sit back and relax before we start another busy week!

My mom's furniture made it here, 1 day earlier than expected. She is so happy to be able to sleep in her own bed tonight. It was like Christmas in July to help her open and unload all of her boxes. I loved seeing all her knick knacks, dishes, and pictures I haven't seen in years. We kind of got off to a shakey start last week when she first got here, but now things are falling into place. She actually sat down and played a game of Uno with Konnor and I yesterday, and has gotten into the pool once so far. Baby steps...

Mom also already had a reply from Banner Health (the company I work for) about a job, she is supposed to call them back Thursday when the lady who hires nurses comes back from vacation. Cross your fingers she gets a good job offer...

Anyway, I will go in Thursday and Friday for a 2 day thyroid uptake scan at the hospital and then I don't see my endocrinologist until August 16th. Brian's upper GI test will happen on July 30th, although he says he is feeling so much better now.